I present, for your reading pleasure, a selected list of things my students have said to me. Some of the original quotes were in Spanish, and I have translated them into English except where I obviously couldn’t.
(while showing me pictures on his cellphone) “This is my wife, and this is my girlfriend”
Me: What happens in Colombia on Valentine’s Day?
Student: Motels. Full.
Student: Teacher, how do you say “chupetón” in English?
Entire class: !MIRA, TEACHER, EL TIENE UN HICKEY!
(as I am cleaning my glasses) “Teacher, you look beautiful with no glasses. Glasses on, ehhh.”
Class: Teacher, does your boyfriend know how to dance?
Student: No boyfriend, friend with benefits.
Class: TEACHER, WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS?
“Teacher, teach me how to Dougie. Please.”
“Teacher, you smell like Victoria’s Secret coco-vanilla. Yes?” (no)
“In Boston, you don’t celebrate Christmas, do you? It’s too cold.”
“Teacher, you are very red.”
“The Caspian Sea isn’t a sea. Caspian is the prince of Narnia.”
Me: What are you going to name your restaurant?
Student: ALF’s Delicious.
(as I am eating an empanada) “Teacher, that will make you fat.”
In my classes, we play a lot of games, and I always have the teams come up with team names. Here is a selected list of some team names:
Bananas in Pajamas
And finally, here is a bonus conversation that wasn’t with a student, but was with a Colombian during my very first weekend in Cali:
(in the car, stopped at a traffic light, I spot a man selling some interesting merchandise from car to car)
Me: Whoa, is that guy selling porn?
Colombian: What? Why would he be selling corn?
Me: No, not corn. Porn.
Colombian: Oh. Yes, of course.